#im equal parts playing stupid and actually stupid and i take pride in there being no way to tell what part is true and what is not

[marowreck-archive]

haha stuff in the tags

[team-council-two]

So how is Spy a special case?

*is excited*

(for context, in a previous post, i added the tags " i could write an entire book on how unfamiliar french people in medias seem to actual french people, spy is an odd case; ask me about him")

aiight, you know what you signed up for, get ready for one hell of a presentation, ft terminal verbosis frenchosis ! this will be in three parts, of course, because three is a good number and the mere concept of having 3 parts should give you all a headache (look ray i didnt add a n this time)

wait shit im not even sure mistral is a spy, hold on,

aw fck thats for real ones

anyways femme fatale trope, next question

HA gotcha, you didnt think id let yall go with just one sentence huh ? so. our fella is french. our fella is a spy. our fella is a huge piece of shit. extremely common, alright ? outright overused archetype. eeeexcept that the combo's execution here REALLY stands out. how so ?

well, let me ask you a quick question. do you think the fact that he is french, and the fact that he is an evil bastard, and the fact that he is a spy are linked ?

well ill answer that for you. nope. valve treated these three traits remarkably separately. the way he speaks french in game is relatively polite, and the insults he throws around are, i checked, exclusively in english. he is surprisingly free of the usual way medias make "being evil" and "being french" be a hand in hand thing, and similarly free of the one that seems to indicate that Because you are french Of Course you are a spy. in other words, rather than being a walking glamour stereotype of sorts or an obnoxious asshole the likes of which we have seen hundreds of, this is a godawful guy that also happens to be a french snob, and that also happens to be a spy.

compare with, say, our lady mistral above who has a shitton of taunts in french, who embraces that whole sexy lady deal, deliberately plays on it and so on. difference is miles.

and now if you followed you did catch i said french snob rather than just french, there is a reason behind this, so allow me to get on part 2, which i promise will be WAY more verbose-

so

im not sure why but american medias love to have peppy rich french fashionistas in their shit. theyre cute, hyper, sheltered as fuck, and the entire deal is weird bc these people seem like aliens to actual french people who tend to care about fashion in pretty normal amounts and definitely do not have that many grands to bust into it. *yes* we pride ourselves in having a pretty neat fashion industry, but in a similar way as the american and the german boast about their cars. we are NOT obsessed with it okay. anyways, sometimes writers have the decency of making these characters cunts, but not always. but what doesnt vary is the trope seems to play out like ah yes, your average french- which is fucking baffling. and is the part taking us aback.

see, we HAVE the evil breed of those characters too in our shit. comedic shit, to be precise. a rundown of our humor is it often is situational humor - stupid outlandish situations with equally stupid archetypal characters, their personality equally pushed into the absurd, all of that more often than not thinly veiling some pretty heavy social commentary. in other words, you often laugh at the evil cop/rich factory/big restaurant owner/politician/etc getting karma'd in mind boggingly bizzare and hilarious ways, while clearly showing them as evil for mistreating subordinates (and often getting shit for it sooner or later) and as simpering cowards towards literally anyone who has any kind of superior position to them whatsoever.

in other words, context matters. where in american shit they are often allies or friends or comedic relief of sorts through being french/annoying or just villains, in french shit they more often than not are *targets* of some kind of events and shown to be ridiculous through other means than their obsession for fashion or whatever.

am i saying that valve did this ?

...yeah. thats a very bold statement, but yes. i mean, cmon,

see, i am overall basing this on the fact that ingame spy is so fucking similar to many, many, many of Louis de Funès' roles, and even his face, it outright had me searching around the wiki for some kind, any kind of claim of inspiration from valve-

he reads exactly as one of them ! rich cunt obsessed with money, constantly mocking people, constantly complaining about everything ever, fakely polite, not opposed to doing vile acts to have his way, extremely menacing face, *the same fucking laugh*, and the fact that characters played by this guy have remarkably often have what we call a couillon de fils, a dumbfuck of a loser ass son, if you will.

the only differences really are from comic spy, who reads far less like this. he's still well executed mind you, but he (especially @miss pauling) reads as far kinder than this dude's characters usually are, and he is a bit more... stretched, both physically and in behaviour, than the actor's goblin build and attitude, as game spy seems to be unable to stand straight whereas the comic one seems to have no difficulty with this, and the similar range of expressiveness that also ports 1:1 is game exclusive as well. and finally, comic spy also was not given the occasion to cuss people out, so.

anyways my point mostly amounts to, if you manage to make french people think of an emblematic actor beloved by many, rather than just make us go through the usual whiplash of "how is that a normal french person to american people ???", you are probably doing something right.

in addition to this wall of text, i am begging you all to watch this, it should help understand what i meant by our breed of humor, and what i mean by "spy could have been played by this dude no problem"

now, onto part 3,

well once you said he is a pathetic wet cat man you summed it up really.

for all the class he has, for all the money he has, for all the. everything ? he still is pathetic. he still is simply seen as a mean as fuck loser either trying to drown his failures as a father with expensive tastes, or simply amoral and unsympathetic because of his concerns being about money rather than about humans. he still is headcanoned as stinking by most of the fandom. nobody respects the fucken spy. he comes across as haughty and it only makes people want to shit on him some more.

really, it is pretty much everything I explained in the two points above. the patheticness helps with making it so he is not a stereotype, and it helps making it clear he is supposed to be representative of rich pretentious cunts rather than of french people.

so, he is a huge bitch, and ironically, this makes him a blorbo to us, bc who doesnt love a good ole flawed character ?

his whole french deal is not shown as eccentric or what makes him a loser but just a coincidence, in a sense. and you'd be surprised by how much of a breath of fresh air this is to french people. shitty in a realistic way rather than a made up clown, and in a way we can recognize in our own medias. it also is neat from the, err, fandom pov ? because you get to develop his frenchness and assholeness and spyness separately, since they are elements implemented for the sake of themselves rather than as a stereotypical whole. you get to have *fun* with him.

SO i think i ran out of things to blabber about. hope it makes sense tho. but i guess it really is about. not *quite* representation because we do not see ourselves in spy, of course, but way more about our culture not being bastardized and being turned into a joke about eccentrics at best, or hatred about seductive women and effeminate/homosexual men at worst, + having a fresh execution on tropes that else usually would get our eyes rolling.

alpha, over and out

[skruttet]

below is some nonsense about snorkmaiden and then a little about her brother at the end idk it doesn’t make much sense probably im sorry i had a clearer idea of what i wanted to say when i started out but then i just forgot it all i think xD

I've always admired Snorkmaiden for her cleverness; she's incredibly brilliant, though she's also incredibly compassionate, so often she'll follow her heart over her head which can end up with her acting or doing something "stupid" (and in all honesty she does possess a level of dumbassery, just as all Moomin characters do! She does tend to be smarter than most, though). 

Similarly, she often allows others to take the credit for her own achievements because she knows it will make them feel better - and these "others" are pretty much always male, specifically Moomintroll and the Snork.

She lets the latter take the majority of the credit for catching the Mameluke in Finn Family Moomintroll, when really they never would have caught it if it weren't for her cunning and inventiveness (a trait often prescribed only to her brother yet I wholeheartedly believe she is equally as inventive, just usually on a more immediate-solutions-to-everyday-problems level), and she hands over the credit for her solutions & discoveries to Moomintroll multiple times in the comic strips, and even in Moominvalley, like when she suggests they should make their own bonfire but almost patronisingly calls him “my clever Moomintroll” when he remarks how the bonfire has helped them.

She does all this to indulge their egos and avoid wounding their pride... which to a modern feminist like myself I dislike and it makes me upset that she won’t take rightful pride in her own accomplishments and in doing so help them realise how capable she - and by extension, women - can be.

But on the other hand, she does do this out of her compassion and love for them. She’s avoiding any conflict or argument, and acting very similarly to how Moominmamma often does; offhandedly agreeing with the prideful male whilst clearly secretly knowing the truth of the matter.

Then on the... other other hand, we know that Snorkmaiden wants to make extraordinary achievements and be recognised for them; she wants to do “something tremendous, all on my own,” and is subsequently very proud when she presents the Wooden Queen to Moomintroll, even recalling it when she gazes at the King’s Ruby. So maybe she just doesn’t believe that her achievements are big or important enough?

On top of all this, Snorkmaiden appears to be a character who is very much affected by society’s views and expectations of women (particularly in the comics which play around with gender roles a lot; usually to make fun of them and point out how silly they are, though oftentimes in Lars’ case I do feel he can just play into & perpetuate them) and she does seem to value being perceived as a stereotypical young woman (weak; attractive; airheaded; etc.) over allowing people to see her brains and bravery. Whether or not this is a good thing, I can’t really say. Part of her appeal as a female character is that she is girly and attractive and graceful - as well as being smart and capable and brave, so maybe I’d just prefer her to value all aspects of herself equally?? (and of course there are many times where she uses her stereotypical qualities in clever ways in order to get what she wants).

ANYWAY I’ve lost where I was going with this now ummm I guess for Moominvalley season 3 I just want Snorkmaiden to start becoming more sure of herself. I mean, it’s tricky cause she’s already SO confident, but having that extra sense of self-worth to not let the boys outshine her achievements would be great. And it’ll be super interesting seeing what they’ll do with Snork; I wrote a post ages ago talking about how he kind of enhances your empathy for Snorkmaiden because he can be so sexist and belittles her but we’ll see if Moominvalley even includes that in his personality. It would make for a great arc for him if they do to some extent; like his sister, he too is very much affected by society’s misogynistic views of women (as well as the stereotypes of men needing to be logical and unemotional) and so he spouts some nonsense that I honestly don’t think he genuinely believes but he was just brought up hearing people say, and he also clearly doesn’t feel comfortable expressing his love for his sister so instead lashes out at her or acts annoyed when really he’s just flustered and is actually very proud of her and loves her very much. So it’d be nice to see him overcome this barrier he’s built and learn to express his emotions more clearly and gently, especially in regards to his sister.

[nice-kill-tanaka]

Hi! I read all your x readers and love them! I especially loved the Bakugou x Rough and Tough Crush, I was wondering if you do a part 2 of that one? Where the squad are trying to get the two together.

Of course Nony! Glad you liked my self indulgent work 🥰

—————

🌄Bakugo + Rough And Tough Crush: Part 2🌌

Looking for the whole set? Take Part 1 right here!

Summary: The Bakusquad gets a little sick of watching you and Bakugo pine after each other in your own...special ways. So, it was decided to devise a plan to get you two crazy kids together!!

A/N: Me, internally: First request, don’t mess it up, first request, don’t mess it up, first request, don’t mess it up, first request, don’t mess it up-

\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/

💥Katsuki Bakugo💥

Let’s start by looking at your end of the pining stick

When Bakugo started treating you differently (like an equal/rival rather than a hurdle to trample on) your own perspective started to shift

You now knew what it was like to be on Boom Boom Boy’s good side. And if you were being honest? It was fun as hell 🔥🔥

Nothing got under your skin very easily, so you took Bakugo’s aggressive taunts and jeers as petty opportunities to take him up on his challenges

What’s better than a free chance to get stronger??? (Mentally, emotionally, and physically)

It wasn’t very long before you began to find Bakugo’s unwavering passion and drive attractive rather than amusing. You wanted to see more of it, to draw it out, to match it

That wild and determined smirk he used past bared teeth when you bested him would really make you feel some type of way 😳

But Y/N is currently a single-brain-celled bastard in this household

My dude, you don’t even misinterpret your feelings. You're just incapable of giving them a label 😭

You just know that you have warm and fuzzy sensations in your stomach whenever Bakugo is being uniquely himself, which you mistook for indigestion on multiple occasions

Y’all are so freaking dumb it actually hurts 😭😭😭

((^^The Bakusquad’s general consensus on you and Bakugo’s mutual pining))

Which brings us to how the Bakusquad decided to go about bringing you hotheaded lovers together

Kirishima casually suggested that they let you two get together on your own, but was out-voted in favor of putting an end to the infinite frustration that came with watching two people crushing on each other and not doing anything about it

Mina and Jiro thought of the first plan:

They’d have a movie night for everyone in the friend group and Mina would conveniently choose a ✨romance✨ movie. The rest on the squad would think of lame excuses to leave in the middle of the film, leaving only you and Bakugo alone (hopefully on the same couch). If things went well, you two would be together by the end of the movie

Their reasoning was that if the concept of romance was introduced at the right time, you’d both feel more inclined to confess your own feelings 

It seemed feasible enough, so the plan was set into motion

As expected, the moment Mina pulled out the Blue-Ray box, Bakugo started to grumble about how corny the film was gonna be

But, Jiro caught a glimpse of you leaning over and muttering something to Bakugo, out of earshot of everyone else

Immediately, Bakugo began to loosen his shoulders, still not happy about the genre, but more complacent. He slouched into the couch and endured it like an adult

During the movie, especially the more romantic moments, the squad constantly stole glances towards you and Bakugo. Unfortunately, there wasn’t much to look at

Bakugo, in the same position as the beginning, didn’t seem bored, but like he’d rather be doing anything else at the moment. His eyes were glued to the screen in a judgmental stare, but that he dared not say anything to ruin a certain person’s experience

You, however, looked like you were enjoying the movie! However muted your position might have looked. Though you weren’t enjoying it cause it was good. Oh no, you looked like you wanted to ✨a s c e n d✨ into orbit with laughter every ten seconds

For the sake of letting the rest of the Bakusquad enjoy the romance aspect, you limited your actions to biting your fist whenever something hopelessly cringy happened

Any longer than the halfway point, and you would’ve broken down in a fit of hysterical laughter, roasts, and jeers at the screen

Soon enough, the rest of the group made their excuses to leave the room momentarily, disappointed with their results

But, when they came back, something beautiful had occurred 

“Why the hell is she running back to the apartment?? HE CHEATED ON YOU?? KILL ‘IM??”

“SKSKSKS- Okay, but wtf is her FACE?! Is that supposed to be distress?? Freakin’ ahegao faceass.”

Bakugo was deadpan roasting the movie with an amused smirk. While you were coming after it with the gusto of Monoma coming after 1-A, snorting with every comment Bakugo made

Neither of you had even noticed everyone else come into the room

(Apparently, you had told Bakugo earlier that you two can shit on the movie all you wanted once you were alone)

Alright...not exactly the plan. But, possibly a step in the right direction

Sero and Kaminari thought of the next “plan”

I only put quotations, because it’s hardly thought out enough to call it one

It was literally just locking you and Bakugo in a closet 🤡🤡

Don’t worry Sero and Kaminari, I’ll play Taps at your funerals 🎺🎺🎺

You and Bakugo didn’t even have a genuine conversation in the closet...You were too busy yelling various profanities at your friends

“Dude, it’s really FUCKING HOT in here. Let us out while I’m still feeling nice!!”

“I’ll murder you bastards when we get out of here!!! You better start running now.”

Btw, you both ended up making it out of there on your own

You managed to deck the doorknob hard enough to break it off, giving Bakugo enough leeway to blow the door off its hinges

Bakugo took care of Kaminari, while you caught and hogtied Sero with his own tape 

You gave each other congratulatory fist bumps afterwards 😚

Despite the rest of the Bakusquad miserably failing in their schemes, their setups did help develop you and Bakugo’s relationship. Just not as fast as they hoped

You had become a pair that could laugh and fight together. Being each other’s advocate became a source of pride for you both

You were all set to become a romantic couple 

But, what actually brings you together??

Well, it went something like this:

I’m not too sure of the exact details, but I know that you and Bakugo were having an extra intense training session

Things were starting to get a bit sloppy, as your bodies were getting tired, but your morale was just as strong as ever

It could’ve just been a freak accident, or something neither of you saw coming

But, the point is: Either of you could’ve gotten really hurt, had you not been the tough cookies you are

In your perspective, you were oblivious to the danger that you had been in. And if you did know, you didn’t particularly care. You only saw that the person you cared about most in U.A. could’ve gotten hurt

The idea of that happening, and it being your fault (or, not being able to do anything about it) really rubbed you the wrong way. You were mostly angry at yourself

But, you took it out on Bakugo

Because you were the first aggressor, Bakugo responded with what he knew best: Aggression

Yes, he was absolutely mad at himself for putting you in danger. But, what made the feeling worse, was that you refused to acknowledge that you could’ve been injured as well

Your blatant lack of self-preservation pissed him off. Why couldn’t you care about yourself the way he cared about you?!

On the outside looking in, the fighting was far too intense for any peer of yours to try and break it up

Yelling, cursing, but neither of you put your hands on each other (Like you usually did when you play fought)

Strangely enough, I think that’s how you could tell the situation was serious

Finally, your emotions had reached their climax. All caution had gone to the wind at that point

You weren’t even thinking when you yelled the next thing in Bakugo’s face

“DO YOU THINK I’D FUCKING YELL AT YOU IF YOU DIDN’T MEAN THE GODDAMN WORLD TO ME?!”

“WELL FUCK YOU IF YOU THINK THAT YOU’RE ANY LESS IMPORTANT TO ME THAN I AM TO YOU.”

At that moment, you both turned away to storm off before abruptly stopping in your tracks

“What?!” You said in unison, registering what you both had heard and said

You sighed, frustrated at your own stupidity, unclenching your fists and begrudgingly explaining your true feelings to the seething object of your affections

As you spoke, you were realizing just how whipped you were for Bakugo. And how you didn’t know it until you were given the opportunity to blurt it out with pure emotion

Your words weren’t very poetic (You actually sounded very constipated), but what you said was what you felt in its rawest form

Bakugo could hardly think of what to do next. His crush was reciprocated and they confessed first??? Wtf???

His silence made you uncomfortable, and you didn’t feel like blowing up again. You huffed, shoved your hands in your pockets, and turned to stalk away, unsure of what to do next

Before you could completely turn on your heel though, you felt yourself being roughly shoved against a nearby wall

You weren’t even given time to react, because as soon as your back made contact with the wall, a warm, caramel-scented sensation met your lips

The kiss you had just registered didn’t even last two seconds, but the lingering feeling stuck with you as your brain effectively shorted out

“Yo, wh-what was that??”

Bakugo was impossibly red, one hand still on your shoulder, keeping you in place. Even though he refused to make eye contact with you, it was clear that what he had just done was completely intentional

He scoffed, voice barely above a grumble, “Damn dumbass...you didn’t even give me a chance to respond...”

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[🌌 There you go bud! That’s one set of headcanons for the road. Hopefully it lasts for a while, but if it doesn’t, feel free to come back! I’d be thrilled to see you again.🌄] —Reagan

[thenonsenseuniverse]

Coffee Cups & Leather Jackets

Hamilton Modern! AU Word Count: 2236 Hamilsquad x Reader Thomas Jefferson x Reader PART 1, PART 2, PART 3, PART 4,  PART 5, PART 6, PART 7 Summary: after a fight with the squad, the reader flashbacks to the past, and gets some help by an unlikely friend.

 “I just want to know what the fuck I did wrong!!” You hissed at your friends. “I haven’t seen you all in weeks, and every single time I try to make plans you all seem to drop out at the last minute!”             

One of them stepped forward. “Y/N…” 

“No, Herc.” You hissed, not willing to hear the next excuse that they wanted to throw at you. You were done with everything. “I don’t want to hear it. I guess you were all ‘too busy’, right? Just like you were the last hundred times.”  

 Alex groaned from his place by the counter. “ Come on! You’re being overdramatic. Just let us explain.”        

You glared at him and crossed your arms over your chest. “I don’t think so. Overdramatic would’ve been me freaking out like this after one week, or even two. But at first, I was stupid enough to believe that you guys were really just over stressed with working at the cafe or with classes and could understand that. And I did. But then three weeks past, and I still hadn’t seen any of you, so I invited you all over for a movie night, and once again you were all busy. Even then, I was still fine with it.” You could feel the lump slowly forming in your throat as tears pricked at the corners of your eyes. “But then later that night, I was at the cafe, doing my homework, and saw you all walk into the movie theater together, laughing and having a great time. You did follow through with our plans, only without me.” 

The four of them, Alexander, Hercules, Lafayette, and John, stood there looking down guiltily. “Y/N, look we’re sorry. We didn’t mean to exclude you. It’s not what you think, it-” Laurens was desperately trying to explain. You knew that if any of them could get through to you, it was him. But there wasn’t time for that anymore. It was too late.

You scoffed and held up your hand to silence him. “No. I’m done. I’ve made enough excuses for you guys myself, I don’t need to hear another one.” You sighed, and shook your head, as you grabbed your bag from the table beside you. “I understand if you guys don’t want to be my friend.” Your voice had gone soft now, turning into something just a little over a whisper. “I don’t think anyone really does, I’m the weird kid remember?” You gave a sad chuckle and wiped at your face. You turned to them one last time, giving them a look that could dissolve even the strongest men to ashes. “But what I can’t understand is why you let me believe you actually cared about me. Why you lead me on for months. I’ve been through a lot of shit, but that has to be the worst. I’m done with being your guys’ charity project. Please, if you have consideration for me at all, just leave me alone.” with that you turned and left, doing your best to get out of their sight before they could see you weak.             

    You sat on one of the many benches in the quad, tears streaming furiously down your cheeks.  You knew it was pathetic to cry about four people who never cared about you, to begin with, and yet here we are.  You should’ve known it was too good to be true, there was no way that the infamous Hamilsquad would want to be friends with the likes of you. You could still remember the first day you met them. 

          It was your third week of freshman year at King’s College, and honestly, you were just barely keeping your head above the water. Your parents had filled your head with fantasies that college would be ‘a fresh start’ that you would make ‘so many new friends’ and that maybe you would actually come out of your shell a little. 

Boy, had they been wrong.

No, college was a lot like high school, only the insults weren’t as childish, and people found new exciting ways to pick on you instead of following whatever was cool at the moment. It was a shame considering your classes and professors were actually amazing, however, you weren’t sure if you’d be able to survive until graduation. 

“You know…” You looked up from your journal at the sound of a British accent approaching you from your right. A boy with loose, light brown curls, wearing a tight red t-shirt and white faux fur jacket that hung carelessly over his shoulders approached you. He had a posse of two following behind him. “I don’t think I’ve heard, the little church mouse here say a single word since the beginning of the school year.” You rolled your eyes at his tactics and tried to focus on your writing as his groupies laughed. He didn’t seem to appreciate that as a second later, your journal was snatched from your hands. 

“Hey! Give th-that back!!” You cried out, rising to your feet. 

He smirked as he held it above his head. “Oh! So the little mouse does speak!!” He laughed and looked down at you, as you tried to grab it back. “Shall we take a look as to what’s so important anyway? Samuel!” He threw the leather bound book over to one of the other boys, who had a hairstyle similar to him but was wearing all black. 

Samuel smirked and climbed on top of one of the benches. “September 21st, Dear diary.” The boy’s grin widened as he realized what they had stolen from you. “I’ve been at this godforsaken place for three weeks now, and I still haven’t found a trace of any intellectuals besides our professors. My parents were hopeful that I might actually make friends here, but I don’t think I want to. Why would I when I have Netflix and doughnuts in my dorm. I’m perfectly fine alone.” He stopped reading as he snickered. “Awww, is the weird kid lonely? Does someone need someone to talk too?” 

You could feel your cheeks grow red at their comments. “G-Give it back, p-please.” You asked quietly, thinking maybe being polite would make them change their mind. 

The word please seemed to strike something within the leader, as his eyes scanned your form. “Well since you’re so willing to beg..”Before he could finish a tall man, wearing a beanie ripped the book from Samuel’s hands, as a much shorter one sporting a ponytail, marched up to the leader. 

“Hey, George! Leave them alone. They didn’t do anything to you, so why don’t you and your group of stuck up pricks, piss off!” 

George opened his mouth to say something, but closed it as two other, very muscular, men came up behind him. You could see him pale slightly as he glared at the shorter one. He snarled. “For the billionth time, Hamilton, it’s King. Not George. And we were just leaving, the little freak didn’t have anything interesting written in there anyway.” He peeked around them and gave you a playful wave. “We’ll see you around, mousey. Sam, Charles! Let’s go.” He snapped his fingers, and the other two fell in line behind him as he walked away. 

A wave of relief fell over you but quickly went away as you remember the four new problems currently surrounding you. “C-Can,” You swallowed down your nervousness and held out your hand. “Can I have m-my journal b-b-back?” You cursed yourself for your stutter. It had the tendency to come and go but stayed with you most of the time unless you were with people you were comfortable with. Unfortunately, that group was limited to your parents and your siblings.

The one with the beanie gave it back to you with a small grin, which you returned as a thank you. You quickly went to gather your things, mumbling out non-sense as you did. “I-I’m sorry you h-h-had to do that. I-It wasn’t y-your problem, a-and I-I-I should’ve just left. I-I mean it’s no-not like there’s anything ex-ci-citing in there anyways. An-and you could-d’ve gotten i-in trouble.” 

A man with, what must be the curliest hair you’ve ever seen, tied up in a bun began to help you but your books in your bag. “Ce n’est pas un problem! George believes d’at everyone belongs to ‘im, and d’at you are only ‘uman if you make more d’an six figures. Il est un piece du merde.” You giggled at his accent.

“Well th-thank you for h-h-helping me. B-but you really didn’t h-have to-to.” You shrugged your bag onto your shoulders as you played with the straps. “I’m used t-to it by n-now.”

One of the men, who had a freckle spotted face, and long curly hair frowned. “Do people usually treat you like that?”

Once again you shrugged. “I d-don’t talk m-m-much. I-I guess it m-m-make me an eas-sy target.” 

The man’s nose wrinkled in disgust. “God, I hate people.” He stated. “They have no right to treat you like that! It’s bullshit! You’re a little shy, and you have a stutter, so what! I bet you’re still an awesome person!” You could feel a small smile form on your face at his obvious passion for equality and anti-bullying. “Do you have anyone to walk to your next class, or to your dorm with?” You shook your head. “Well you do now, let’s go.” He grabbed your hand and began to march in the direction opposite of your dorm. 

“John, what about our plans! We’re supposed to go hang out at the cafe!” You could hear the short one call out.

You could hear him mumble a small ‘oh shit’. He stopped for a second in thought before turning to you. “Do you want to come with us?” 

You blinked up at him in shock. No one had asked you to hang out with them since you were in middle school. From then on people claimed you were too weird to be seen with because you preferred the company of fictional characters than real people. You frowned and looked at them all again. “I-I don’t know who you are, and y-you d-don’t know me. Why would you w-want to h-hang out?”

John chuckled and pulled you towards the group. “Because that is how friends are made! You’re never going to get to know people if you don’t take any risks! Now, I’m John Laurens, I’m the president of the equality society and the PRIDE club. The Frenchy with the barely held back afro is  Marie-Joseph Paul Yves Roch Gilbert du Motier de Lafayette, Marquis de Lafayette. But since no one has the time to say all of that, we just call him Lafayette, or Laf for short.” An offended ‘Hey!’ came from the Frenchman. “The intimidating man in the beanie is Hercules Mulligan. Don’t let his name or size intimidate you, the man is a walking teddy bear. He’s actually a fashion design major. And lastly, we have Alexander - Nonstop- Hamilton. The only student both stupid, and smart enough to be able to tackle a triple major. He runs on coffee, barely sleeps and appears to have a slight temper as the price of that.” 

As he listed off the names something clicked in your head, and you realized exactly who you were looking at. This was the self-named Hamilsquad, one of the most popular groups in the school. They were known for picking fights with others who didn’t treat other people fairly and were usually seen around the Schylur sisters. You couldn’t believe they were talking to you. “So,” Alex began, looking at you with a curious glint in his sleep-deprived eyes. “What’s your name. 

“Y/N. M-My name’s Y/N L/N. I h-haven’t g-gotten around to doing m-much.”

Hamilton chuckled and wrapped an arm around your shoulder, as he pulled you into the group. “Well, just you wait, y/n. You hang out with us, and I guarantee you won’t have another dull moment for quite some time.” You smiled at his promise and nodded as you walked with them. For once you thought this might work. For once you thought maybe, just maybe you’d have real friends. 

You felt a sob shake your body at the memory. You missed them, they were all you had. They brought you out of the lonely shell you had formed around yourself and showed what it was like to be truly happy before locking you back into your prison. And now you were alone again. You were stupid to fall for their charm, but now al you wanted was to be in their arms again. They took apart of your heart that you didn’t know existed, and left you feeling cold, and empty inside. You just wanted to be whole again. 

“Excuse me, Darlin’“ You were torn from your thoughts by the sound of a deep southern drawl. You wiped at your face once more and looked up to see a man with warm brown eyes sporting a dark, magenta leather jacket on top of a black tee shirt. He gave you a pitiful smile and sat down beside you, pulling out a small pack of kleenex from his pocket. “You look like you could use some company.”

AN: Hello! This is just the beginning of a series I hope to do! Please tell me what ya’ll think, and we’ll see how it goes

[octannibal-blake]

Prompt 'im sorry i accidentally kissed you after playing house for bellarke

For you, nonny! This one got away from me, too. I’m not good at short drabbles apparently, but hey, who cares! Enjoy!

*

Bellamy’s life is perfectly together for the first time since he was five and his sister was born. She’s off at school and he’s only working one, stable job that makes enough for him to live comfortably. It took a while to get here, but he’s enjoying the freedom and the lightness. No longer does he hold the weight of the world on his shoulders. So leave it to Clarke Griffin to completely ruin his bliss.

He’s cooking breakfast for himself on this fine Saturday morning when she barges into his apartment (why he thought it was smart to give her a key, he doesn’t know) and asks him to be her fake boyfriend.

Which is problematic for him because he’s spent the last three years wanting to be her real boyfriend. They met in college, forced to work together on an art project (he took it because he needed another elective, and she’s an art major) and despite not getting along at first, they became best friends. Mostly because she’s a spitfire and he’s a dick and somehow the universe just knew the two of them would cause chaos together. It works. He’s been half in love with her for most of their relationship but the timing has never been right, whether one of them isn’t available or he just completely chickens out. Not to mention she calls him her friend all the time and while he’s not the kind of guy to believe in the friend zone, sometimes it’s really hard not to.

“What?” He asks stupidly, holding his spatula in mid-air having been distracted from his egg flip.

“My mother is coming into town and I need to prove to her I have my life together despite having not gone to med school,” She hops onto his counter and reaches over to his plate of bacon to snag a piece.

“But you don’t have your life together,” he says before swatting at her hand as she goes for another piece, “Quit eating my food!”

She pouts her lip and pulls her hand back with a sigh, “Thanks for reminding me. I just need to create the illusion I do, which includes using you as my significant other.”

“Why would having a boyfriend somehow mean you have your life together?”

She’s batting her eyelashes at him now, which always means she wants something ridiculous, “Well…maybe not just a boyfriend. Maybe a boyfriend…i live with?”

He drops his spatula with a loud clang, “You can’t be serious.”

She grasps his arm with both hands, “You’re my best friend, Bell! Help me look less pathetic!”

He still feels a slight twinge at the word friend but pushes it down, “Let me guess, you don’t want your mom to see what kind of travesty you live in?”

She lives in a small studio apartment that has no working air conditioning and also tends to get a mice infestation every few months. It’s pretty awful. They usually always end up at his place to hang out and, okay, she’s slept over on more than one occassion but always in the guest room!

“Also that.” She confirms for him and he shakes his head at her antics. He knows he’ll regret it, but if he’s completely honest he misses the company. He’s not fond of living alone and his place has felt eerily empty lately. It’s a dangerous line, doing the whole fake boyfriend thing especially when feelings are involved on his end, but she makes it very hard to say no.

When he agrees, the smile on her face makes it all worth it. God, he is so screwed.

*

It’s surprisingly easy to fall into domestic bliss with her, which doesn’t exactly help his case at all. The day before her mother comes, Clarke comes over with a bag full of items to make the apartment look more ‘equal’. She’s going for a very convincing argument. Pictures of them have been scattered around the place, some in the living room and a couple in the bedroom. She always forces him to take picture when they’re out so most of them are drunken one am photos. She’s taken over his bathroom placing her hygiene products all over the shower and hair products on the counter.

“Is that necessary?” He asks as she hangs a few dresses in his closet for good measure.

“I’m trying to be thorough,” She replies. By the time she wears herself out, it definitely looks like they live together. He has to admit, she’s dedicated. He also doesn’t mind having her stuff around. Having her around…

Things go relatively smooth from there. Her mother arrives and is friendly enough to him. She actually seems impressed which makes something like pride swell in his chest. It’s a nice apartment in a nice part of the city and while Clarke has mentioned her mother being a snob, he’s still satisfied by her approval.

Being best friends has given them a comfort around each other that has only been beneficial. They touch each other freely and it’s not weird and quite honestly, from the outside anyone could see they are a couple. He tries to build Clarke up to her mother, mentioning small successes she’s had with her art and okay, maybe, fabricated a little. Clarke beams at him as he dotes on her and everything feels natural.

It gets a little weird when they remember they’ll have to sleep together in the same bed. When she walks out of the bathroom in an oversized t-shirt he genuinely thinks about throwing himself out the window because she looks so beautiful standing there and yet they aren’t like that. Pretending to be her boyfriend has been easy but her mom is asleep and they don’t need to pretend anymore.

“I can put shorts on,” She says awkwardly tugging on the end of her shirt. Clearly she hadn’t thought this through before walking out.

“I’ve seen you naked, remember?” He tries to ease the tension but that might have been the worst thing to say, “Remember when I had to carry you home after the whole Finn dilemma?”

It seems to work, “Ugh, don’t remind me. That was not my finest moment.”

She had managed to get so drunk, standing was nearly impossible and he had to take her home. She puked on herself and like the knight and shining armor he is, he managed to bath her and change her before putting her to bed. She told him she loved him that night, but he’s not sure she remembers. He definitely didn’t bring it up.

She crawls into bed with him and they fall into an easy silence. He lies on his stomach and is just beginning to drift off when she says, “Thank you again, by the way. You didn’t have to help me, you know?”

He’s groggy when he responds, “You’re lucky I love you.”

His eyes snap open when he realises what he said and holds his breath.

She laughs gently, “I love you, too.”

Too bad, he thinks to himself, if only she meant it in the same way.

*It’s gets weird. And confusing. The following night he is in the kitchen cooking dinner for everyone when Clarke gets back from her walk with Abby. She joins him in the kitchen while her mom showers and he laughs when he sees the newly formed sunburn tainting her pale skin.

“Forget the sunscreen, princess?” He teases and she smacks him playfully on the shoulder.

“I didn’t think we’d be outside all day…” She mutters miserably, poking at the skin on her arm.

“Clearly,” he laughs before moving to the refrigerator to grab some aloe. He squeezes the goo onto his fingers and gently rubs it onto her skin. She watches him carefully, like she’s surprised by the intimate gesture.

“All good,” he says wiping the excess onto the dish towel next to him.

“Thanks, honey,” she coos and before he can react she pecks him on the lips.

He’s frozen, his lips burning from the contact. It was an innocent kiss but he felt it all the way to his soul.

Her eyes widen, “Shit…I–”

His mind is racing. Did she mean to do that? Does she know how he feels about Her? Does she feel the same? She regrets it, doesn’t She? He fucked up. This plan was stupid.

“Smells good!” Abby compliments as she enters the room and suddenly the moment is over. They step back from one another and he clears his throat awkwardly.

“I interrupted something, didn’t i?” Always the perceptive one.

He tries to make light of it all, “I was just telling Clarke about the benefits of sunscreen.”

Just like that, the moments over. Things go back to normal, he and Clarke continue the charade and he can’t help but wonder what happens when it’s all over.

*

By the end of the trip, Abby Griffin seems to be very pleased with the way her daughter has turned out, even asking that she paint something for her office at work. Clarke nearly bursts into tears. He’s happy to see that their relationship is on the mend, even if it’s partially based on a lie. It’s not that Clarke isn’t successful, just that she’s not that successful. She’s not living the dream like she hoped and she isn’t in some perfect relationship. He should be bothered by it, but he does get it.

He remembers how upset Abby was to find out her daughter was pursuing art. That was toward the beginning of their friendship and he’s seen their relationship go back and forth since. He’s glad to help, but he’s starting to wonder at what cost. How long can he continue to just be friends with her? He has to tell her.

When they go back into the apartment after seeing Abby off, things are quiet. She’s wanders idly about the living room, running a hand over the picture frames she brought with her. Now or never, he thinks.

“So…” He leads with, and it’s not the best thing he could say but he’s kind of at a loss.

It seems to work, though, because suddenly she’s wringing her hands in front of her and word vomiting all over the place..

“I’m sorry I kissed you, I just got really caught up playing house and it’s been nice and, I don’t know, I thought you were my boyfriend for a second.”

She looks so small and innocent now. Guilty, even. Which hurts because he doesn’t want her to be sorry about it.

He decides now is the moment. It was bound to happen, hell, it’s been building for a long time.

“I’m not sorry,” he says simply and moves towards her, “I’ve been wanting to do that for a long time.”

She releases a long breath, like she’s been holding it in this entire time, “Really?”

He laughs and reaches out to tuck a loose strand of hair behind her ear, “I’m so in love with you, Clarke. I have been for a long time.”

It feel cathartic to finally say it. Even if she doesn’t feel the same, he’s just happy to have it out there. He didn’t realize how heavy it’s been, but he feels lighter now.

When she laughs, he worries for a second that maybe it was a mistake and he’s ruined their entire friendship. But then she throws her arms around his neck and kisses him, really kisses him like her life depends on it.

When she pulls back, lips swollen from the activity she brushes a thumb across his cheek, “I love you, too, by the way.”

*

A month later she moves in with him for real this time. Half her belongings were already there, anyways.

[communist-cat-girl]

Ok So

im on my shit again cause pragerU is still makin fuckin’ videos time to yell about PragerU - The Least Diverse Place In America

(0:08) They had me in the first quarter, im not gonna lie, i thought this would be some interestin social justice piece and that maybe prageru’s obvious racism and ignorance were instantly solved by this Charlie Kirk guy. I was so wrong.

(0:28) Okay because there still totally isnt racism on college campuses or anythin’??? and like a ton of misogyny??? that isnt addressed at all??? ever??? but sure dude okay, lets act like colleges are good and perfect.

(0:46) So this is just ... I mean he sounds like an idiot who did zero research already but here we go. Can’t wait to have a straight white guy tell me about queer acceptance.

(0:59) Umm no not at all, people will still forever be homophobes and transphobes and every other phobe on the block. Also who the fuck signs a consent form for sex? They’re not doing kinky shit they’re caricatures of a man and a woman kissin’. Also seriously dude? Experimenting? This isn’t the fuckin’ 80′s, we know people are gay for sure and that people know full well what the hell they’re doin’. Experimenting is the way straight people have been disenfranchisin’ actual gay feelin’s for ages and this dipshit is perpetuatin’ that while tryna’ claim that these issues are “been there, done that,” as if anythin’ is solved. Fuck you already Charlie you clearly don’t know what the fuck is goin’ on in the world.

(1:04) If I had a dime every time I heard some conservative asshole talk about this in relation to safe spaces alone I think I’d have enough money to pay for my tuition. Barely.

(1:10) Ye, that thing racists, homophobes, and straight up nazis try to say is an issue because of us nasty liberals. I know the phrase and I know you’re boutta’ spew some bullshit about the first amendment, hit me already.

(1:21) ... Have you been to a college campus ever dude? Seriously, this is an honest question. I don’t even think hes been out in the real world if he thinks conservative ideas are radical or that colleges shut down “diversity of thought.” They shutdown bullshit because bullshit questions don’t need to be asked.

If a nazi asks “Why don’t we kill all Jews?” We do not attempt to explain to them the immorality of genocide nor do we explain to them their ignorance for thinkin’ that Jewish people are somehow the issue in their lives instead of their own mediocrity. We ignore them and move on, as we should. Because they’re fuckin’ idiots.

(1:25) You mean society, right? All of society does is indoctrinate you into a specific way of thinkin’. College isn’t special in this, every single region, culture, and subculture, even on accident, will attempt to indoctrinate you to their way of thinkin’, that’s just how it works naturally. We learn and grow from new experiences and interactin’ with different people, it’s an incredibly important part of our growth. College is an incredibly diverse place where we can do that!

(1:36) I don’t know if you know what’s up politically but people on “The Right” like to defund schoolin’ and bash on our teachers for no reason. So yeah ... they’re gonna’ be more left leanin’ considerin’ who their enemy is when it comes to literally makin’ a wage high enough to pay rent and eat food.

(1:46) ‘Cause no conservative signs up ‘cause they know their antiquated ideas will be shutdown in two seconds because colleges are, often, forward thinkin’ institutions that want to include many different people as they possibly can instead of lettin’ some white middle class straight cis asshole tell other people what to do???

I’m not even overeactin’ here, every experience in college i’ve had with a white conservative man who is my superior has been hellish and degradin’, it sucks. You give assholes power and they become bigger assholes, it’s how it works dude.

(1:59) What kind of conspiracy theory bullshit are you talkin’ ‘bout. No one’s paycheck depends on victims ‘xcept ... well no one. Ever. In the history of everthin’.

(2:10) My core being is superficial to you? What the fuck dude? My pride in bein’ an Italian American, Wiccan, liberal, demisexual, polyamorous, transgender woman is important to me, it’s at the very core of who I am, not some superficial mask I put on. What I am is what I fuckin’ am and that shit that makes me a unique individual is important. Fuck you Charlie.

(2:13) What!? What the fuck!?

How is glorfyin’ who someone is at their core superficial and how is it destructive? Who hurt you Charlie? Who told you that positive feedback and kindness and love is harmful?

(2:16) The only thing destroyin’ real learnin’ is a) people bein’ willin’ly ignorant to honest to the gods facts and b) the fact that republicans are defundin’ education like a mother fucker.

(2:25) a) We’ve all learned from Shakespeare dipshit. He was a surprisin’ly forward thinkin’ man for his time period and wrote what is considered to be some of the greatest works of art in the western world. b) Who isn’t readin’ Shakespeare cause he was a white man? I still do, I enjoy his shit. I know plenty of other queer people who enjoy his shit. What are you gettin’ at here?

(2:34) N- ... no it doesn’t dude. I’m literally a queer woman on a college campus. I am accepted into a group despite my transness and ethnic background. Everyone, black, white, asian, and so forth, speak to each other with respect. Genders, while not treated equally by the old, conservative staff, all get to say what they want and are given equal value in conversations. I live in Texas, not a very liberal place, but I still experience more acceptance and confidence than I ever did with even my parents.

This is clearly bullshit right wingers pull to split apart people in the left by claimin’ that our actions somehow divide us even though, if recent protests and counter protests held by the left against the right proves anythin’, its that our differences unify us. Unlike all of you middle class cishet white asshats.

(2:42) No.

Even ignorin’ my experiences, I’ve never heard a single issue with liberals excludin’ other liberals. It’s always conservatives who either exclude or get pissy when their radical ideas get them excluded. Same with radical liberals really.

(3:03) Has it? Also does that matter? The issue is that we have a stupid amount of people in poverty and a stupid small amount of rich people who are stockpilin’ money that is ruinin’ our economy.

Look I actually like capitalism as a concept, I also like communism, and socialism, hell I even like a monarchy or a tribal system where chieftains and elders hold votes. These concepts (both the economic and ideological ones) on paper are all perfect and good and do more harm than good.

The issue is that in practice, here in America, capitalism is ruinin’ lives as we speak and is goin’ to lead to an international crisis sooner than later on both an economic and environmental level. Capitalism, as it stands, is unsustainable, and our stance needs to change.

(3:06) No? When? Can you give me an example because if you mean places like Cuba or China or North Korea or the Soviet Union those were all communist regimes that acted more like dictators than representatives of their people. Real ass communism hasn’t really been done outside of small communes. People are just too power hungry for their own good, the only difference with capitalism is that their avarice is given praise by the masses.

(3:14) Do not act like we alone made some kind’ve ever lastin’ peace. Do not act like we haven’t instigated violence in the Middle East like it’s a fuckin’ game of Hearts of Iron IV. We, as a nation, are warmongers at worst and war profiteers at best.

(3:21) Because as well all know poor people do not commit crimes because they’re poor and aren’t given a way out of their shitty economic situations no no no, they do it because they’re black and play the victim card.

And of course slavery didn’t both ruin the lives of millions of people by makin’ them and their descendants poor and underprivileged, black people are poor because they choose to be violent and lazy. Obviously.

[/Sarcasm]

(3:29) Maybe because they’re wrong when they say this shit and we don’t want old ideas that don’t work or are objectively wrong or based too highly on subjective thought.

(3:37) I think Trae Crowder said it best when talkin’ ‘bout the nazi bullshit in Charolettesville, “They’ve been losin’ battle after battle, fight after fight for 200 years in this country and these are their death rows.”

Your stupid ideas are fallin’ off, the reason you have a voice right now is because you’re gettin’ desperate and so are the old rich assholes who are afraid taxes will empty even 1% of their fuckin’ pockets who give you the money to even exist.

(3:34) And that’s what they do! And we look at what people on the right do and we all cringe because it’s stupid! We’re not all closeted entitled fuckin’ rich kids goin’ to ivy league schools on our parents dime! We know what the real world is and it’s fuckin’ tough and scary and everyone is pitted against us. We know these things. Dumb fuckin’ bitch. I’m seriously tired of this guy right now.

(3:50) ... ... Did this dude not think we know what liberal means?

(4:12) Noble goal, I wish the rest of America would adopt this kind of “Melting Pot” idea, we’d prolly have way less issues honestly.

(4:25) ??? Why are you mad that people are bein’ kind and decent ???

(4:31) Thanks for usin’ actual terms in an attempt to disenfranchise them of any real meanin’. The same shit is happenin’ with the word triggered so y’know, not really a new tactic. Also one that doesn’t work on changin’ minds. This entire channel is an echo chamber I swear.

(4:35) Wow he’s ... stupid huh. The words mean what they mean asshole. Maybe ask one of your queer friends? You’re diverse in thought, right? Oh wait no your diversity of though doesn’t take queerness into account. Because you’re an asshole.

(4:52) ... No.

Like literally no, where do you get this idea from? Other liberals do not think like other liberals, there is infightin’ in EVERY culture, includin’ college campuses you fuckin’ dipshit.

I’m sorry I’m mostly just callin’ him a dumbass cishet white asshole middle class piece of shit but I’m really pissed off with his willful ignorance.

(4:54) No, it’s not. The two things do not compare.

(5:01) You mean what queer, black, and many other disenfranchised people have been doin’ for ages? Okay.

(5:12) No. Shit.

Video over. I want to die. I hate this dude so much.